It's chilly early autumn wind, the time of the afternoon was so leisurely and comfortable, the sun light is dizzy, hazy and make the light blue sky appears gloomy.
I am sitting under the tree in front of the couch, watching hand green bamboo leaves, imperceptibly into a distant memory.
That year, I was 6 years old.
When the sky is blue, water is very clear, even the wind with light fragrance of bamboo leaves.
Don't know why, I am very quiet, she didn't love to laugh, probably because the environment of my life - the hometown of most of them are the old man in the village, young people go out to work, not the children, even if it does, it can't often go out to play, because the old people always be swayed by considerations of gain and loss, all of a sudden turn invisible man is thought by human traffickers, so all day long staring at their children, don't let him run away.
Like a caged bird, delicious good drink, every day is not supposed to have freedom, thus formed the temper of autism, even if the host opened the door one day, you will not go out, because do not fly, also don't want to learn more.
Grandma doesn't like other old man looked at me firmly, but the other children don't go out, I had no fun, then stay at home all day, see animation, practice.
Until the autumn, he appeared.
He is like a beam of light, nine, ten, I heard him tell grandma to take me out to play, and some outside the village children, all with low head, like a fear of the world, because the old man always can speak some dangerous thing, let them fear, afraid to go out to play.
I was the smallest of them, a girl, I heard my grandma with the ke rambled mandarin, agreed to the request of the boy, don't know why, my heart have a caper, such feeling, we've never seen a bit of a novelty.
Seven or eight children so we go out, all I have been a little pull the boy folds, he also don't mind, let me pull, I am sure that we don't have a person in this village, but I think he is a man of very rich sense of security, as if he is in, nothing happens.
My home town and surrounded, beautiful scenery, the only access to a road, so few people to play, he took us to climb a mountain halfway up the hill, there are stone, three high, after the stone don't know when to have a small lawn, has withered by half, some dark color, make the person's mood very not up, but there is a bamboo forest by lawn Mao Zhusheng many high, over the lawn, leaves hanging over the rock nearby, sunshine is illuminated through the green bamboo leaves, added a few minutes for such a tiny world green.
Leng for a while, the god of me, suddenly found that hand a loose, quickly recovered panic looking for him, don't know why, empty hands, it seems empty a piece of heart. But on one side, he didn't go far. He stood at the edge of the rock, slightly bigger stone, seems to want to climb up, I quickly ran past, stand tiptoe to pull his legs, he looked back, eyes have a little confused, so look at me, asked: "what's wrong?" His voice is very nice, very fine very soft and very clean, I think not heard the voice, can not help but have a moment of lapses, he saw that I don't speak, just go back and continue wondering how to climb, I return to absolute being, mouth shouted: "brother." My voice of waxy waxy, should be a long time didn't make any noise, he turned again, gentle smile, looking at me, waiting to hear the word of my next, I slowly open, voice still so young: "you're going to leave me?" With some careful, I asked gently. He one leng, then smile amplification, eyebrow eye, curved such smile is beautiful, I think I have never see such a smile in my life, because the smile is from the heart, very clean, without any impurities, but I was such a laugh shakes her eyes, because that smile too sincere, too bright, not for me so that all the year round in the dark.
He stood high, like a deity, the pageant is the bright and dazzling light, his smile, his hand, as if he were to his subjects to grace, I hastened to retract a hand, away from his hand to touch my head, for fear that I such a humble person defiled his holy hands.
The smile on his face froze, in the whole of the light in my eyes slowly retreat, finally like a normal person, I think. Take back his hand, looking at me, mouth issued a voice like that, or so light: "elder brother go up, where are you going?" I heard, a little afraid, but don't want to play with other children who are here I will not play games, so I nodded, look down to the ground dead after half of the grass, no longer look up, because I know that I couldn't get on.
I hear he smiled two voices, that laughter is like the water on the walls of the smooth voice, so clear, so pleasing to the ear. I look up at him, a bit at a loss, he clear eyes filled with smile, "I hold you up." He spoke, the corners of the mouth or sitting, canthus is carrying, as if met something funny, when I recall what he said, were startled, but his older, I am a high head, body also is very thin, how can I hold.
He looks at a face of surprise, I jumped down from the stone, and looking for some cat so big stones, under my surprised eyes, one by one on he had stood on a stone, some mud on his hands, he just brush on the brown shirt, he looked back at the stupidly I hand wipe on my face for a moment, then ha ha laugh, I return to absolute being, stretched out his hand and touched the face, a little dirty, but didn't care, maybe it's because at the time was a little less love clean.
Later, he let me to find a small stone, filling the gap between the big rock, so as not to wait up after a fall off because of the shaking.
In this way, both of us with a variety of large stones on the large stone set up a small platform.
He carefully climbed up, and then turned back at me out of the dirty hands, I hold on, a little uneasy, go after, when I stand in situ, also dare not move, just afraid of accidentally fell down, he turned again, the foot in those holes, dents stone slow, quivering, feet are solid and strong, climbed it, without a few he stood tall, very happy appearance, eyes have a spot under the sun, like the stars twinkling, I looked up at him, like a worm, in looking at the generation on blessing the gods of the world.
He look into the distance, as well as voice sighed with emotion: "true the United States." I try to look about the place that he saw, but in my point of view, most of the light is blocked by boulders, was dark, but let me to adapt to, this is the place where I should live, cold, damp, no light, like a dirty wallowing in the mud of earthworms, never touch it holy and clean blue sky, even see, only see mud mixed with dirty day, so don't go to yearn for, no longer to pursue, living in his ordinary and humble, until to die.
I seem to see the divine in retrospect I, out of the dirty without losing your holy hands, towards me. I look up at him, his smile, bright smile and pure, let me lapses, so looked at him, for a long time. Unknowingly, I stretched out his hand, holding his, his hand slightly bigger than me, wrapped in my hand, that kind of feeling is very wonderful, let me the trance. Later, he stepped on my feet before stepping on the place, he push pull on it, I always go up, just to look at the place, where there are mountains, the mountains there are houses, the top of the mountain mist, sunshine is illuminated through clouds, hazy spread out, there are layers of aperture, is really beautiful.
Maybe it's because the place is too high, a little scared, so I sit. Is green bamboo leaves under the sun, as in the body warm, very comfortable. He stood on my left, the fork wear a waist station, like the heavens and the earth open yes pangu, with heaven and earth to jacking, though this feel, but a wind blowing, his clothes were filled, he gives me a kind of illusion can be blown away by the wind, I quickly pull the dragging folds of his, he looked back at me, smile of brilliant, face, eyes, mouth, full of smile, I looked at him, and said in a low voice: "brother... you can sit down?" I think I should be really afraid, will say so.
He is full of smile eyes appeared a little confused, but fleeting, I even doubt that is my illusion, he ha ha smile, stretched out his hand and touched my head, and said "yes", then lay down beside me, with his hands under the head, a green light reflected in his eyes, very beautiful.
I looked at him and asked: "elder brother, why do you want to take me out to play?"
Sit up, he saw my one eye, like thinking for a while, said: "baby, always the love to play some." After laughing, then suddenly I feel he is like a madman.
I have no language looked at him, eyes have could not hide the contempt, he saw me such a look, leng leng, held out his hand, after on my forehead play a chestnut, then ha ha laugh, I eat pain narrow squint, stretched out his hand and touched the place had just been playing, frown looked at him, probably because at the time was a little, little bullying is not happy, then crying up, he saw that I cried out, turns out to be unprepared: "are you...... you don't cry ah, brother... brother is in the wrong line not line, you don't cry, ok." I think he is really don't know how to coax a child, but I later changed the idea.
His panic said, as if even shaking voice, "that... that I blow curved son to listen to you, you don't cry, ok." I stopped crying, turned sniffles, I think I the ability to control how so good.
He see me crying, like a sigh of relief, and then stood up, stand tiptoes, from hanging on the top of bamboo took a piece of bamboo leaves, I suddenly felt he grow so high, like a man. He sat down, took his bamboo after bending the knee, the bamboo leaves to mouth, lips slightly parted, close your eyes, and a string of beautiful notes would waft out, like a catkin brushed blue waves, take up the ripples, like the wind, gentle like water quiet, like a quiet down, and in this moment all over the world more than just the gentle melody.
He looked calm, bend the knees at the moment with bamboo leaves blowing song, to show his heart vulnerable, he always smile, but it does not mean he is happy, because in some cases, his smile always failed to reach, even with a hint of sadness, he now, I have never seen before, so weak, so fragile, like a child, need the protection of the adults.
Like a song, he opened his eyes, eyes with tears, does not seem to be, he looked at dorky I, forced out a smile, but the mood also is full of sadness, I heard him say: "this song, is my mother call me, hear very well." His eyes, let a person love dearly.
I nodded, should be a sound, so they don't speak, I think I was a little, also not qualified to comfort a ratio I big brother.
He stretched out his hand and touched my head, and make my hair is a mess, and ha ha laugh, I don't know if his smile from the heart, because there are a lot of people laugh always narrowed his eyes, let a person can't from his eyes to see into his heart.
Casual, I a little corners of the mouth upward hook, don't know whether I smile, only feel quite happy.
He was stuck at the moment I hook up the corners of the mouth, and then smile, I heard him say: "finally smiled, little girl." After a while, and said, "!"
I was shocked, hurriedly convergence up, no longer see him.
He looked up at the already inclined at the edge of the mountain, the sun, losing of bamboo leaves, said: "it's about time to go home."
I stood up, and came before the local hesitated, because it is a little high, before I thought I was such a climb.
After that, I feel there is a hands reached into my armpit, itch a bit, but did not dare to move, because he had picked me up, feet off the ground, I'm afraid of fall.
I feel his slightly move a small step forward, then I slowly put down, struggling a little bit, he slowly, bending, the knee, the body slightly forward, until my foot and the platform is a knee distance, he let go, I placed firmly on the ground. I looked back at him, I saw he walked with his knee, with his hand the howl of the gasped, reddish, describing a nose is sweat, he saw that I look at him, suddenly open mouth smile, smile of satisfaction, like we did anything.
According to the before went up after him when he climbed down the look, carefully down from the platform together with me.
The children are doing little game, sleeping, some in collect some clean green bamboo leaves, a word each dry matter, each other, just like the old man in the village, are always afraid of get something bad, so that the village is always so quiet, quiet.
I heard him say hello to all the people around to, tell them to go home, all followed him all the time.
This time, I didn't pull the dragging folds of his, because I don't think he is stronger than I go, but he took me by the hand, and smiled at me, with you go under the direction of the.
He's like an adult, send all smaller than his children to go home, then send me.
It is a little dark at that time, I want to sleep a little, in a daze, I heard him say: "to smile more in the future."
In the home, grandma's look some panic, she put me on his back, blame a few words to him, say how so late to send me back, he said sorry sorry, forgive and then left.
That night, I sat on the bench, grandma in the side to wash dishes, I suddenly remembered before he told me my girl, has picked up the corners of the mouth unconsciously, feel a little stiff, and then I heard the voice of broken bowl, looks up to see grandma are to pick up the pieces on the ground, I unknown, oneself went to brush my teeth.
To sleep, I how also can not sleep lying on the bed, stared at the ceiling of the black eyes open, I don't know how long, I hear my grandma whispered to grandpa said: "you see, the child just laugh how scary." ......
The next day, I didn't speak, also can saying is I haven't much talking, sitting all day in bed, thinking about my grandma last night, thinking he didn't come to me to play today.
Finally, I still didn't endure, asked grandma: "elder brother yesterday?"
Grandma seems paused, then said to me: "the elder brother is a foreigner, just to play yesterday, today and went away."
After I listened to the zheng, slowly move the steps back to his own bed, was crying in a low voice, but my voice is very light, light even soon be hide myself in the past.
After a few days, I still so, occasionally go over to the rock to sit alone for a while, but can't climb up anymore --
Unknowingly turns out to be asleep, wake up bamboo still in your hands, gently put it on his lips, but can't blow out the tune that was slow and light.
Early autumn, leaves the sound wave; Young, you still smile. Now, bamboo has a few new; Where did you go?. Remember - end
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